Dear All, the members of this Blog apologize for not updating consistently since we have all been very busy with our lives. There were some comments left by Anonymous' on a Post that has since been removed and it addresses the issues of Canadian national women who have been married to a Saudi citizen while abroad and then disappearing. One of the comments was left on March 17th, 2013 and the other recently:
I'm a Canadian with an 11 month old little boy, and only 4 short weeks ago after a 2 year relationship, his father left us and returned to KSA. This is an undescribable heartbreak for not only myself, but for our son in the future. His communication with me has stopped only less than a week ago. Before it was I miss you guys so much, I love him, and so many other wonderful things... and now nothing. While he was here he bought presents for the baby, and would stay with the baby while I went out, he was involved. He loved him. I can't understand how any man could hold his son, kiss him, look into his eyes and tell him he loves him and then just leave him. This is a huge sadness in my life. I feel your pain.
My husband is from Riyadh and we have a small son who has just started to walk. He was there for his birth and signed the certificate of birth identifying him as the legal father. Except now he ran back to Saudi Arabia and is refusing to give me the full custody of my son, scared I will marry again and he wil lose his son. Because of the laws i cant get him a Canadian passport, travefl or even medical insurance. Can you advise me on what to do? How can I also show my son his father's homeland and bring him up in a good Islamic home? Thank you.
Judging from the comments, these men have severed all ties to their children therefore losing any rights given to THEM by human nature. Unfortunately for Anonymous #2, this is affecting her ability to apply for the simplest items entitled to her son born on Canadian soil to a Canadian mother such as a passport & Medical Insurance -- because he signed the Canadian birth certificate. Anonymous #1, it is unclear if your son's father signed as the legal father but nonetheless your story moves me because this is *exactly* what my son's father did to us; the end of communication for almost 2 years. I have advice for both of you and to any other Canadian women out there who have faced this problem or eventually will.
I have lived in the Middle East on-and-off for a little over 5 years and have met people from all backgrounds, mostly local & Islamic mixed with a lot of cultural beliefs that are backwards to us. Arranged cousin-marriage for example (this is important to know) is something done a lot in the Saudi culture. Bedouins even in the cities believe in this practice so if a member of their family, a son for example, marries or has a relationship with a girl **from outside** their blood-pool let alone OUTSIDE THEIR COUNTRY, it is seen as a big shame and the son could be ostracized and cut off from inheritance. Now, anyone from Canada/USA/Europe married to a Saudi will say that he is a real man because he can face his family with his marriage abroad or intention to marry a foreigner. But they are a man, not a scared punk @$$ loser who leaves his innocent baby alone in the world. I'm sorry to both Anonymous Canadian women and anyone else who is experiencing this :-(((
Now to the technical part.
If your child's birth certificate is signed by your husband or boyfriend -- in the country of Canada, it doesn't matter if a couple is legally married or not, whoever signs is the legal father of the child -- you will need to find a family lawyer who understands your case, try and get your estranged Ex to participate through the Canadian embassy and have him sign over full custody rights. IF he doesn't want to, you will need to go further and rent a courtroom, find a judge and present your case of Abandonment & Intention for Full Parental Custody. It will cost around or up to $5000CAN which includes lawyer fees, court fees and hiring a judge to hear the case. But in the long-run, $5000 is worth your child's freedom and your choice to raise him in a Canadian home.
As for bringing them to Saudi Arabia.
Unless you have some sort of protection from the Saudi government, such as wasta (connections) through a high-ranking member of the Saudi royal family, please NEVER NEVER NEVER bring your child here. If your Ex acts in such a way against his own child while overseas, think about it; he will have no problem taking him from you just to spite you and see you suffer as a mother & human being. The legal system here is very biased and if he makes a case against you for his child, providing evidence that you're an unfit mother (non-Muslim, doesn't cover etc) the judge will side with him -- then you will be at the mercy of your Ex and the Saudi courts. A lot of Canadian and American mothers have been un-willfully sent back to their countries *without* their children. Don't become a statistic... Getting your child out of Saudi Arabia isn't easy and I repeat, if you don't have connections/protection, DON'T BRING YOUR CHILD HERE!! You will risk losing him forever, God forbid.
I hope this answers the questions any of you may have and if you need any more info, please leave a comment in the Comment Section and one of us will do our best to answer accordingly.
-- A Canadian Mother to a Saudi Son